History Jokes: Navy Blunders: Admiral Benbow


Funny anecdotes and short stories are a great source of examples in public speeches. This website contains short funny stories, clean jokes and humorous legends of kings and queens, politicians, famous literary figures and artists from many books and sources. The styles of writers from different time periods was preserved - they often enhance the stories in an amusing way. Enjoy and have fun!

Navy Blunders: Admiral Benbow  
When Admiral Benbow was a common sailor, his messmate, who was stationed with him at the same gun, lost his leg by a cannon shot. The poor fellow instantly called out to his friend, who immediately took him up on his shoulder, and began with great care to descend with him into the cockpit; but it happened that just as the poor fellow's head came upon a level with the deck, another ball carried that off also.Benbow, however, knew nothing of the matter, but carried the body down to the surgeon, and when he came to the bottom of the ladder, called out that he had brought him a patient, desiring some one to bear a hand, and help him easily down. The surgeon turned about, but instead of giving any assistance, exclaimed, "You blockhead, what do you do here with a man that has lost his head?" "Lost his head!" says Benbow; "the lying fellow, why he told me it was his leg; but I never in my life believed what he said without being sorry for it afterwards."
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You're no Mozart 
Thursday, May 1, 2008, 01:00 AM - Jokes and anecdotes of famous people, Funny Music History
Posted by Queen of History Jokes
Mozart was once approached by a young man who was interested in Mozart's advice on how to compose a symphony. Since he was still very young, Mozart recommended that he start by composing ballads. Surprised, the young man responded, "But you wrote symphonies when you were only ten years old." "But I didn't have to ask how," countered Mozart.
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Saved by the Empress 
Thursday, May 1, 2008, 12:57 AM - Jokes and anecdotes of famous people, Jokes and funny Stories about Kings and Queens, royal history
Posted by Queen of History Jokes
Maria Fedorovna, Empress of Russia and wife of Tsar Alexander III, was known for her charitable works. In fact, she once saved a comdemned man from exile in Siberia by changing a single comma in the warrant signed by her husband. Instead of reading: "Pardon impossible, to be sent to Siberia," she changed the document to read: "Pardon, impossible to be sent to Siberia." The man was thus saved and released.
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Louis XI: The Star King 
King Louis XI of France was a firm believer in astrology and yet he was somewhat uneasy when an astrologer accurately predicted the death of a lady at court. He felt the astrologer would be better off dead, so Louis called him to his apartments where his servants were ordered to throw him out the window once given the signal.

First, however, Louis asked the man a question, "You claim to understand astrology and to know the fate of others, so tell me what your fate will be and how long you have to live." The astrologer replied, "I shall die just three days before Your Majesty." This so unnerved the king that he decided to let the astrologer live.
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C. S. Lewis-- a First Class Author 
Lewis, returning home from a walking tour, had just boarded the first class compartment of his train. An old lady, startled at seeing Lewis' unkempt appearance asked him, "Have you a first-class ticket?" "Yes, madam," he replied, "but I'm afraid I'll be needing it for myself."
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