History Jokes: Puns and Conundrums


Funny anecdotes and short stories are a great source of examples in public speeches. This website contains short funny stories, clean jokes and humorous legends of kings and queens, politicians, famous literary figures and artists from many books and sources. The styles of writers from different time periods was preserved - they often enhance the stories in an amusing way. Enjoy and have fun!

Puns and Conundrums 
Friday, December 12, 2008, 05:45 PM - Satire
Posted by Court Jester
Some Puns and Conundrums from "Wit and Humor of the Age" by Melville De Lancey Landon, Mark Twain


Why is a lawyer like a restless sleeper?
He lies first on one side and then on the other

What is the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws, a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.

What animal would be likely to devour a near relation?
The ant-eater.

Why is a gun like a jury?
It goes off when discharged.

What animal has death no effect upon?
A pig; when killed he can be cured.

Why are teeth like verbs?
They are regular, irregular and defective

Why is a kiss like a scandal?

Because it goes from mouth to mouth.

Why is the most discontented man, the most easily satisfied?
Nothing satisfies him.

"The peace maker" - a pair of scisors.

"Can't be beat" - turnip.


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