History Jokes: Isaac Newton and his dog

While Newton was attending divine service in a winter
morning, he had left in his study a favourite little
dog called Diamond. Upon returning from chapel
he found that it had overturned a lighted taper on
his desk, which set fire to several papers on which
he had recorded the results of some optical experiments.
These papers are said to have contained the
labours of many years, and it has been stated that
when Mr. Newton perceived the magnitude of his loss,
he exclaimed, " Oh, Diamond, Diamond, little do you
know the mischief you have done me!"

From The Life of Sir Isaac Newton by David Brewster


See also:
Sir Isaac Newton and the Apple
Dog training ideas

Byron once gave his publisher, John Murray, a splendidly bound Bible, and the recipient was proud of it until he happened to discover that his friend donor had altered the last verse of the 18th chapter of St. John (Now Barrabas was a robber) so as to read: "Now Barrabas was a publisher."

From The poetical works of lord Byron, with illustr. by K. Halswelle

In 1649, René Descartes, a famous French philosopher and the author of the "Cogito ergo sum" principle, accepted the invitation of Queeen Christina of Sweden, who was deeply interested in philosophy, and traveled to Stockholm. As he explained to her majesty the basics of his mechanistic philosophy, comparing all living beings to mechanisms, the queen remarked that she had never heard of a watch giving birth to little baby watches.

See also: Watchmaker argument

Pyrrhus, after his victory ofer the Romans, near the river Siris, said to those sent to congratulate him, "One more such victory and Pyrrhus is undone."

From Dictionary of Phrase and Fable: Giving the Derivation, Source, Or Origin of Common Phrases, Allusions and Words that have a Tale to Tell by Ebenezer Cobham Brewer

Chester Harding, while painting a portrait of Daniel Boone asked the great frontiersman if he had ever been lost. "No," said Boone, "I can't say as ever I was lost, but I was bewildered once for three days."

From Daniel Boone and the Wilderness Road by Henry Addington Bruce