History Jokes:

Funny anecdotes and short stories are a great source of examples in public speeches. This website contains short funny stories, clean jokes and humorous legends of kings and queens, politicians, famous literary figures and artists from many books and sources. The styles of writers from different time periods was preserved - they often enhance the stories in an amusing way. Enjoy and have fun!

Sergeant and a philosopher 
Sunday, April 13, 2008, 12:23 PM - Anecdotes and jokes about writers, philosophers and scientists
Posted by Court Jester
Dr. Gregory, professor of the practice of physic at Edinburgh, was one of the first to enroll himself in the Royal Edinburgh Volunteers, when that corps was raised. So anxious was he to make himself master of military tactics, that he not only paid the most punctual attendance on all the regimental field-days, but studied at home for several hours a day, under the sergeant-major of the regiment. On one of these occasions the sergeant, out of all temper at the awkwardness of his learned pupil, exclaimed in a rage, "Why, sir, I would rather teach ten fools than one philosopher."
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Understanding Einstein 
Albert Einstein's friend was once asked if it was true that only ten people in the entire world truly understood the man. After some pondering the man replied, "Oh, no. There at least twenty, but Einstein is not one of them."

From From Newton to ESP by L. LeShain.
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Descartes refuted 
Latin language and the vicinities, painting of Rome

In 1649, René Descartes, a famous French philosopher and the author of the "Cogito ergo sum" principle, accepted the invitation of Queeen Christina of Sweden, who was deeply interested in philosophy, and traveled to Stockholm. As he explained to her majesty the basics of his mechanistic philosophy, comparing all living beings to mechanisms, the queen remarked that she had never heard of a watch giving birth to little baby watches.

See also: Watchmaker argument

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Death of Archimedes 
When Syracuse was taken, Archimedes was describing mathematical figures upon the earth, and when one of the enemy came upon him, sword in hand, and asked his name, he was so engrossed with the desire of preserving the figures entire, that he answered only by an earnest request to the soldier to keep off, and not break in upon his circle. The soldier, conceiving himself scorned, ran Archimedes through the body, the purple streams gushing from which soon obscured all traces of the problem on which he had been so intent. Thus fell this illustrious man, from the mere neglect to tell his name; for it is due to the Roman general, Marceline, to state, that he had given special orders to his men to respect the life and person of the philosopher.

From Percy Anecdotes
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Plato's wit 
Plato, living in the Academy at Athens, which
the physicians considered unhealthy, was advised
to remove to the Lyceum. "I would not have
removed even to the top of Mount Athos," he
replied, "for the sake of a longer life."
(Aelian, Var. Hist. ix. 10.)

* * *

When Plato was lecturing on his theory of "Abstracts,"
Diogenes said, "Table-ism and cup-ism
I cannot see, though I can see a table or a cup."
"That," replied Plato, " is because you have eyes
to see the one, but not mind to apprehend the
other." (Diog. LAERT. vi. 2, 53.)

From Greek Wit: A Collection of Smart Sayings and Anecdotes by Frederick Apthorp Paley
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